I am the girl who believes in once upon a time and happily ever after. I love love. Which is why I was so sad to hear a friend say she does not believe love will ever happen to her. She believes it for others, and used to dream it for herself, but she does not belive it to be hers now...or ever. I can't imagine being that broken. This is where God is the healer. We have to give over our ideas of what love is and have God show us. The love we would show a brother or sister, a partner, a parent, a friend or a stranger all need to reflect God in us.
God has flipped my idea of love upside down this last year. He took it from a very father daughter love to that of a loved one. He has taught me, and I am still learning, how to love better. He has given me great examples and even had me try for myself(and caught me when I fell).
To be continued...
26 October, 2009
21 October, 2009
New Moon is almost here.
This post is for Heidi, Sarah, Sarah, Tash, Grace, Nicole, Jo, Sela and Cathy.
So you got to let me know...Should I stay or should I go?
Mood: Mentally decided
Song: The Clash- Should I stay Or Should I Go
Current Visa Status: Work VISA/PERMIT expires June 2010
Holidays Planned: Home to NY for Christmas and New Years
Projects in NZed: Labor Day outing, Kate's Hens Weekend, Kate and Paul wedding, Thanksgiving Dinner, Ignite 2010, Parachute, Kids Encounter Jr. 2010, Cession Collide 2010
Goals Reached: Bungy jumped off the Auckland Harbor Bridge!, Succesfully set myself a budget(and have so far stuck to it), Continue to run with Grace (Roommate)
I couldn't get to sleep last night...It became one of those times where for about 2 hours I just laid motionless talking things out with God. And I woke up this morning with new hope! If you spend anytime near me, you will hear about my family and my home. I love them both. I am passionate about both. And being here, I worry a lot about how my family is getting on, and who will look after my little sister. Last night God gave me a huge gift...peace, but it came with me giving Him something... I gave him my family. I'm doing what I should have been doing from the beginning. I'm trusting that the God who loves and cares for me will do the same for my family and my friends. This frees me up to focus on being obedient to whatever it is He asks me to do or asks me to go.
I think the reason I had so much trouble sleeping (may have been the late night grilled cheese at Denny's) is because I had been talking with a friend about my next plans... I was excited, scared, happy and sad all in 5 minutes while I talked about it. He's the second person I've told. And the more I talk about my new plans the more real they become. I love NZed. I love the friends, that are my new family, I have made. I love serving the littlies and the youth and I know if I stick around I can do better next year.
Deciding to stay on another year is an easy and a hard decision. Easy because all I have to do is fill out some paperwork, continue to work, and have some fun with the ministries I am a part of at Cession. Hard because the 3 people whom I have become very attached to and love serving alongside are all looking like they will be moving on and I'm sad to think what life here without them will look like. And also hard because the longer I am away from home, the less it is home. Scary, as I've never known anything other than here or there.
But here it is. My mental decision which is about to be followed through with verbal, physical and paperwork action. I am staying in New Zealand for a 3rd year. I plan to extend my visa in whatever way is necessary. I want to do a better job with the kids ministry for 2010. I want to continue to help Paul with youth. I will continue to grow the new relationships I have made here. I will visit friends! I will hopefully travel a bit. I know this is what God needs of me at this point in my life, and that is all I need to know. He's got me in His hands, and I am happy here.
Thanks to those who let me talk these things out with you. You bless me!
Song: The Clash- Should I stay Or Should I Go
Current Visa Status: Work VISA/PERMIT expires June 2010
Holidays Planned: Home to NY for Christmas and New Years
Projects in NZed: Labor Day outing, Kate's Hens Weekend, Kate and Paul wedding, Thanksgiving Dinner, Ignite 2010, Parachute, Kids Encounter Jr. 2010, Cession Collide 2010
Goals Reached: Bungy jumped off the Auckland Harbor Bridge!, Succesfully set myself a budget(and have so far stuck to it), Continue to run with Grace (Roommate)
I couldn't get to sleep last night...It became one of those times where for about 2 hours I just laid motionless talking things out with God. And I woke up this morning with new hope! If you spend anytime near me, you will hear about my family and my home. I love them both. I am passionate about both. And being here, I worry a lot about how my family is getting on, and who will look after my little sister. Last night God gave me a huge gift...peace, but it came with me giving Him something... I gave him my family. I'm doing what I should have been doing from the beginning. I'm trusting that the God who loves and cares for me will do the same for my family and my friends. This frees me up to focus on being obedient to whatever it is He asks me to do or asks me to go.
I think the reason I had so much trouble sleeping (may have been the late night grilled cheese at Denny's) is because I had been talking with a friend about my next plans... I was excited, scared, happy and sad all in 5 minutes while I talked about it. He's the second person I've told. And the more I talk about my new plans the more real they become. I love NZed. I love the friends, that are my new family, I have made. I love serving the littlies and the youth and I know if I stick around I can do better next year.
Deciding to stay on another year is an easy and a hard decision. Easy because all I have to do is fill out some paperwork, continue to work, and have some fun with the ministries I am a part of at Cession. Hard because the 3 people whom I have become very attached to and love serving alongside are all looking like they will be moving on and I'm sad to think what life here without them will look like. And also hard because the longer I am away from home, the less it is home. Scary, as I've never known anything other than here or there.
But here it is. My mental decision which is about to be followed through with verbal, physical and paperwork action. I am staying in New Zealand for a 3rd year. I plan to extend my visa in whatever way is necessary. I want to do a better job with the kids ministry for 2010. I want to continue to help Paul with youth. I will continue to grow the new relationships I have made here. I will visit friends! I will hopefully travel a bit. I know this is what God needs of me at this point in my life, and that is all I need to know. He's got me in His hands, and I am happy here.
Thanks to those who let me talk these things out with you. You bless me!
My Life According to Wilco...
Using only song names from ONE ARTIST/BAND, cleverly answer these questions. Post as “my life according to (band name)”
Pick your Artist: Wilco
Are you a male or female: Casino Queen
Describe yourself: Dreamer in My Dreams
How do you feel: That's Not the Issue
Describe where you currently live: Hotel Arizona
If you could go anywhere, where would you go: Impossible Germany
Your favorite form of transportation: Walken
Your best friend is: We're Just Friends
You and your best friends are: Too Far Apart
What’s the weather like: Sky Blue Sky
Favorite time of day: Monday (I know, it's a stretch)
If your life was a TV show, what would it be called: Sunken Treasure
What is life to you: Box Full of Letters
Your last relationship: Someone Else's Song
Current Relationship: Jesus, Etc.
Your fear: What's the World Got in Store
Thought for the Day: Someday Soon
How I would like to die: Everlasting Everything
What is the best advice you have to give: You Never Know
Pick your Artist: Wilco
Are you a male or female: Casino Queen
Describe yourself: Dreamer in My Dreams
How do you feel: That's Not the Issue
Describe where you currently live: Hotel Arizona
If you could go anywhere, where would you go: Impossible Germany
Your favorite form of transportation: Walken
Your best friend is: We're Just Friends
You and your best friends are: Too Far Apart
What’s the weather like: Sky Blue Sky
Favorite time of day: Monday (I know, it's a stretch)
If your life was a TV show, what would it be called: Sunken Treasure
What is life to you: Box Full of Letters
Your last relationship: Someone Else's Song
Current Relationship: Jesus, Etc.
Your fear: What's the World Got in Store
Thought for the Day: Someday Soon
How I would like to die: Everlasting Everything
What is the best advice you have to give: You Never Know
Spring Showers
(The Message) Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
There's an opportune time(season) to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:
A right time for birth and another for death,
A right time to plant and another to reap,
A right time to kill and another to heal,
A right time to destroy and another to construct,
A right time to cry and another to laugh,
A right time to lament and another to cheer,
A right time to make love and another to abstain,
A right time to embrace and another to part,
A right time to search and another to count your losses,
A right time to hold on and another to let go,
A right time to rip out and another to mend,
A right time to shut up and another to speak up,
A right time to love and another to hate,
A right time to wage war and another to make peace. lists a few of
There are many seasons/times that we go through. God made the world with 4 beautiful seasons that we get to experience every year. Spring is here, and with it comes flowers, new life and spring showers! Spring showers may be tears that have been cried or rain that God has sent to cleanse. (Like a walk I had in the rain...It was the best! And I came home 'clean'.) New Zealand, when the sun comes out, is breathtaking in spring. The lambs cover the hills, the flowers smell amazing and the entire country is green. But spring is also unpredictable...You could wear flip flops one day, and be putting on boots the next. You never quite know what the day will hold. Kiwis have a saying of 4 seasons in a day. After living here for the last year I can relate to that saying about the weather and about the emotions that can be evoked. I know I've lived 4 heart and faith seasons in a day...many times over.
At the moment, I am in a season of letting go and of obedience. Which has it's own share of spring showers! God is having me ask the questions that hurt to ask. Sometimes I don't understand the answers. And sometimes...I'm left understanding.
This note is for my maree, who is showing me what it means to be brave and teaching me to love and laugh in life.
It's also for my captivating friends. You know who you are. Be loved, give love and feel lovely.
Spring, Summer. Fall. Winter.
By, Rachel Nigro
If you're my friend for a season
I hope the weather never changes
Where the days are long
And the nights are too
I'm happiest when
I spend then with you
If you're my friend for a season
I pray we live it well
With adventures to share
You could hold my hand
You could stay here with me
Or not...I would understand
There's an opportune time(season) to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:
A right time for birth and another for death,
A right time to plant and another to reap,
A right time to kill and another to heal,
A right time to destroy and another to construct,
A right time to cry and another to laugh,
A right time to lament and another to cheer,
A right time to make love and another to abstain,
A right time to embrace and another to part,
A right time to search and another to count your losses,
A right time to hold on and another to let go,
A right time to rip out and another to mend,
A right time to shut up and another to speak up,
A right time to love and another to hate,
A right time to wage war and another to make peace. lists a few of
There are many seasons/times that we go through. God made the world with 4 beautiful seasons that we get to experience every year. Spring is here, and with it comes flowers, new life and spring showers! Spring showers may be tears that have been cried or rain that God has sent to cleanse. (Like a walk I had in the rain...It was the best! And I came home 'clean'.) New Zealand, when the sun comes out, is breathtaking in spring. The lambs cover the hills, the flowers smell amazing and the entire country is green. But spring is also unpredictable...You could wear flip flops one day, and be putting on boots the next. You never quite know what the day will hold. Kiwis have a saying of 4 seasons in a day. After living here for the last year I can relate to that saying about the weather and about the emotions that can be evoked. I know I've lived 4 heart and faith seasons in a day...many times over.
At the moment, I am in a season of letting go and of obedience. Which has it's own share of spring showers! God is having me ask the questions that hurt to ask. Sometimes I don't understand the answers. And sometimes...I'm left understanding.
This note is for my maree, who is showing me what it means to be brave and teaching me to love and laugh in life.
It's also for my captivating friends. You know who you are. Be loved, give love and feel lovely.
Spring, Summer. Fall. Winter.
By, Rachel Nigro
If you're my friend for a season
I hope the weather never changes
Where the days are long
And the nights are too
I'm happiest when
I spend then with you
If you're my friend for a season
I pray we live it well
With adventures to share
You could hold my hand
You could stay here with me
Or not...I would understand
28 September, 2009
Thanks to Derek Lau!
My friend Derek posted this on his facebook today, and I knew it needed to be posted here. You have to see it to believe it!
Check out this website: http://www.datetosave.com/
Check out this website: http://www.datetosave.com/
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