Death By Manicure...

Okay, so the title is a bit dramatic...

On November 28th I had the pleasure and the honor of being a bridesmaid, alongside Juanita, for two of my great friends Kate and Paul Milbank! It has been a crazy few months leading up to the wedding. We had an awesome High Tea for Kate's bridal shower, and then had a girl's weekend away just last month!

The day before the wedding Juanita and I got our mani/pedi combos done at the mall. (mistake #1) The lady was pretty aggressive with me and cut my cuticle back too far...no biggie, right?

**It was my first pedicure and only my second manicure**

The next night, at the reception, I started feeling poor and lightheaded. I assumed I was just tired from all the wedding stuff. But in the car, on the way home, I noticed that my finger looked red and puffy at where a cuticle should be. Late that night/early the next morning I washed my hand and put some antiseptic cream on it and went to bed. Too soon after closing my eyes, I was wide awake and in throbbing pain consuming my right ring finger and the joints in my wrist. I tried to care for it myself-I'm a hygienist, how difficult could it be?- but soon found it to be beyond what I could do.

My friend Carmel and I went to the A&E (ER) and I was put on antibiotics with orders to watch the tracking crawling it's way up my arm... The morning and afternoon go by and the tracking climbs it's way from my wrist to my armpit in a fast way. We go back to the A&E and I am put on IV antbiotics for 3 days, and nasty tablets for a following 7 days. I had blood poisoning, and was a few hours away from being very sick. Thank you God for Carmel and her smarts. :) And for Brett Jones who worried me the most. Haha!

The Sunday night, with an IV line left in my left hand and a bandaged up finger on my right, I stayed out at friends until 12am and then stayed up myself another 2 hours. I was watching the tracking on my arm... making sure it went down. I've never been afraid to sleep before. Talk about wanting your mom to make it all better. I prayed for a constant 2 hours. I know there is power in prayer, and I am so grateful that I got blessed by it that night. I love it when prayers are answered with a YES... and quickly. :)

Derek Lau was a big fighter for me when I couldn't fight for myself. Thanks D-Rock! And thank you to all my prayer people, you made such a huge difference!

Today is my first day off the antibiotics!!! God is good, and I feel great!

Just so you know.

Do I Ever Continue When I Say I'm Going To?

Answer:
No.

I've been reading a lot lately. But not my usual reading. I've put aside the top 100 Whitcoulls novels and Penguin collection of stories to pursue a different type of reading.

I've decided, and written out a chart, to re-read The Bible from yesterday until New Years. It's definitely going to be a discipline to find the time while I am out and about in NZ and the USA. These next few weeks are going to be very very busy.

Last night I read:
1 and 2 Thessalonians

My favorite passage read last night:
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
"Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus."

I've also been reading a lot of C.S. Lewis lately. And I'm not adventuring in Narnia. :)

Some of my favourite quotes of his are:
Nothing that you have not given away will ever be really yours.

Don't use words too big for the subject. Don't say "infinitely" when you mean "very"; otherwise you'll have no word left when you want to talk about something really infinite. (I need to work on this...at the moment, everything is my favorite.)

There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, "All right, then, have it your way."

And my favorite C.S. Lewis quote, and the most uncomfortable because it rings true, is:
To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable

My New Years Resolution:
I want 2010 to be the year I finally let down my guard. Where I answer questions honestly and fully. I will make eye contact and hope that my heart shows in my words and eyes. This is very scary, but I know God will work through it.

Update on NZ:
I have commited to being here until Christmas 2010. This is dependent on my residency application being accepted. If it isn't, I'll be back in America June 12, 2010. Prayer over this would be really appreciated.

Here are a few of my favorite pictures of the last year(and a bit):

Dreaming With A Broken Heart.

I am the girl who believes in once upon a time and happily ever after. I love love. Which is why I was so sad to hear a friend say she does not believe love will ever happen to her. She believes it for others, and used to dream it for herself, but she does not belive it to be hers now...or ever. I can't imagine being that broken. This is where God is the healer. We have to give over our ideas of what love is and have God show us. The love we would show a brother or sister, a partner, a parent, a friend or a stranger all need to reflect God in us.

God has flipped my idea of love upside down this last year. He took it from a very father daughter love to that of a loved one. He has taught me, and I am still learning, how to love better. He has given me great examples and even had me try for myself(and caught me when I fell).

To be continued...

I bought my plane tickets for home...

I feel poor.

New Moon is almost here.

This post is for Heidi, Sarah, Sarah, Tash, Grace, Nicole, Jo, Sela and Cathy.

So you got to let me know...Should I stay or should I go?

Mood: Mentally decided
Song: The Clash- Should I stay Or Should I Go
Current Visa Status: Work VISA/PERMIT expires June 2010
Holidays Planned: Home to NY for Christmas and New Years
Projects in NZed: Labor Day outing, Kate's Hens Weekend, Kate and Paul wedding, Thanksgiving Dinner, Ignite 2010, Parachute, Kids Encounter Jr. 2010, Cession Collide 2010
Goals Reached: Bungy jumped off the Auckland Harbor Bridge!, Succesfully set myself a budget(and have so far stuck to it), Continue to run with Grace (Roommate)


I couldn't get to sleep last night...It became one of those times where for about 2 hours I just laid motionless talking things out with God. And I woke up this morning with new hope! If you spend anytime near me, you will hear about my family and my home. I love them both. I am passionate about both. And being here, I worry a lot about how my family is getting on, and who will look after my little sister. Last night God gave me a huge gift...peace, but it came with me giving Him something... I gave him my family. I'm doing what I should have been doing from the beginning. I'm trusting that the God who loves and cares for me will do the same for my family and my friends. This frees me up to focus on being obedient to whatever it is He asks me to do or asks me to go.

I think the reason I had so much trouble sleeping (may have been the late night grilled cheese at Denny's) is because I had been talking with a friend about my next plans... I was excited, scared, happy and sad all in 5 minutes while I talked about it. He's the second person I've told. And the more I talk about my new plans the more real they become. I love NZed. I love the friends, that are my new family, I have made. I love serving the littlies and the youth and I know if I stick around I can do better next year.

Deciding to stay on another year is an easy and a hard decision. Easy because all I have to do is fill out some paperwork, continue to work, and have some fun with the ministries I am a part of at Cession. Hard because the 3 people whom I have become very attached to and love serving alongside are all looking like they will be moving on and I'm sad to think what life here without them will look like. And also hard because the longer I am away from home, the less it is home. Scary, as I've never known anything other than here or there.

But here it is. My mental decision which is about to be followed through with verbal, physical and paperwork action. I am staying in New Zealand for a 3rd year. I plan to extend my visa in whatever way is necessary. I want to do a better job with the kids ministry for 2010. I want to continue to help Paul with youth. I will continue to grow the new relationships I have made here. I will visit friends! I will hopefully travel a bit. I know this is what God needs of me at this point in my life, and that is all I need to know. He's got me in His hands, and I am happy here.

Thanks to those who let me talk these things out with you. You bless me!

My Life According to Wilco...

Using only song names from ONE ARTIST/BAND, cleverly answer these questions. Post as “my life according to (band name)”

Pick your Artist: Wilco

Are you a male or female: Casino Queen
Describe yourself: Dreamer in My Dreams
How do you feel: That's Not the Issue
Describe where you currently live: Hotel Arizona
If you could go anywhere, where would you go: Impossible Germany
Your favorite form of transportation: Walken
Your best friend is: We're Just Friends
You and your best friends are: Too Far Apart
What’s the weather like: Sky Blue Sky
Favorite time of day: Monday (I know, it's a stretch)
If your life was a TV show, what would it be called: Sunken Treasure
What is life to you: Box Full of Letters
Your last relationship: Someone Else's Song
Current Relationship: Jesus, Etc.
Your fear: What's the World Got in Store
Thought for the Day: Someday Soon
How I would like to die: Everlasting Everything
What is the best advice you have to give: You Never Know